Watching on of my husband's favorite TV shows last night, Glee, I was chuckling on the 'teen drama' depicted in the show. Both my husband and I agreed, it's a better show when they just sing and dance.
But that thought gave me pause, am I really beyond being an angst-filled, drama-induced teenager?
I certainly have days, sometimes weeks, filled with dramas, anger over perceived slights from friends, co workers or bosses. Perhaps I haven't completely grown up or moved on? Perhaps I still like my dramas, my upsets, my fantasies of how I am a diamond covered in coal and people just don't see past the coal to see my true worth. LOL The truth is, I 'know' better.
I know that no one will discover the true worth of me before I do and am willing to be at peace with myself. I know that what I focus on will most likely come to fruition.
Every once in a while, I catch myself having dark desperate thoughts, and then putting the mental breaks on, saying something to the effect of, "Woa-woa-slow-down-stop-stop-stop". In a crazy way, I actually saw that there is something hypnotic about the dramas I play out in my mind. Something in all that some part of me likes. What is that all about, huh?
So, what do I do about it? Perhaps that is where art, music and writing can play an unmeasurable part. Giving us a place to put these dark thoughts, that we would never wish upon ourselves, or others, but we do need a place for it. We cannot have the light without the dark. And sometimes the dark is in the light and the light is in the dark. It gives us a more rounded experience of life, a more balanced one.
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