Integrity = Being

"An integral being knows with out going, sees without looking, and accomplishes with out doing" Lao Tzu

What is it to be integral? What is it to have integrity? To be, in the face of no agreement, to be in the face of malice, hatred, and judgement?

It perhaps the most challenging place to be, but one we all, in one way or another, must come to terms with.

Joseph Campbell calls it the Heroes Journey, we are all a hero in our own life, and the journey is to be, a human being, not a machine. To work and live in the world; but not be of the world. Said another way, to 'not sell your soul' to comply with what you know to be against to your values.

For example, it's not to take advantage of another person, when you know they either do not understand, or are not educated enough to understand the consequences. Way too many people sell out their soul for money, to make strides and gains. It's just as dire as making war on the other, when we rob, cheat and steal, over price, under pay, or do not pay.

Who loses, is the soul. The soul in each of us loses. It will take a new passion for the soul of us, that inner light and life within each of us, to gain our integrity back. It can be done. It may take one person at a time, coming to terms within themselves, but it can happen.

'Either Or' World

I have been upset concerning a friends behavior.

She had asked me to start a committed group of people to support each other in going beyond what is comfortable and easy. She said she noticed she had stopped growing and wanted a way to support getting in shape or what ever goals we had put down for ourselves.

She was very clear who she wanted in the group and who she didn't. Okay, I understand.

So, we start the group and design a once a month meeting and a Monday night call. In less than two months she is leaving the group, because it's not doing what she wants it to do.

Wow, I thought how passive aggressive. To leave something you create because you are not getting 'your needs met'.

What happened to communication? What about working with the people or person to clear up what you need, and ask for a different focus? What happened there?

As I examined her behavior I saw that she is in an either/or world. "Either 'X' or 'Y'. Either you change or I'm leaving, either you do this or I will do that.

That's what makes nations go to war, people commit murder, adultery, rob, steal, lie, cheat, and on and on.

I understand it's hard to communicate, it's challenging to push through old patterns of suppression, withholding, and silently judging others. That's when I saw my behavior, when I do that. I'm living in the same either/or world as she.

If I want her to realize what she is doing, I will need to realize when I am doing it. If I want our world to alter, transform and become effective, I will need to step up. I will need to communicate my needs and hold the space for all of it to work out.

All of It

Life is all of it. Not just some of it, but all. So, all of the things we wish weren't part of our world, such as homicide, disease, torture, death, robbery. As well as love, compassion, joy, laughter.

But to disavow the one diminishes the other.

To embrace the light as well as the dark gives a kind of unshakable power. One not dependant on circumstances, or timing. Power that develops over time.

The real power is in not pushing away the dark side of life or oneself, but collaborating with it.

Perspective

It usually helps me, when I am in a particularly bad place, to think of the entire universe and just how small I am in the scope of things. Small but intricately connected, much like a tiny string of a spider web. The movement of that string will still be felt along the entire web.

It helps for me to believe, really believe, that the universe is friendly towards me, and that any bump in the road, no matter how hurtful, I can choose to rise.
In my rising, in my reaching for the attitude and emotions that will give the most efficient spin on my circumstances will be in the best interest not only of myself, but for the universe as well.

If I live in a universe where everything is connected, everything matches up like a giant jigsaw puzzle, my gift is to relax, breathe, and take actions towards awareness. Easier said than done, but I keep my actions towards that goal. Conscious awareness.

Do I Improve or Develop?

The question came across my head this morning: I've done a lot of self-discovery programs, read lots of books on self-improvement, taken classes on goal setting, worked through all sorts of issues, to become a better person. So, why do I feel so inept, lost, unqualified, and stupid?

Why with every step I take towards improvement, I feel less and less improved? Why are all my insecurities, neuroses, neediness, weaknesses, showing up so in my face?

I sat with that thought for a while, and then it occurred to me, maybe I've got it all backwards. Maybe it's isn't about me improving, getting better, or being perfect, maybe it's more about me, discovering and revealing the inner core of my being. Maybe I could think of myself as Clark Kent.

Clark was willing to play the fool, the one picked on, demeaned, because he knew inside he was capable, strong, and resilient. He didn't question his worth, in a society that badgers us to constantly see the new and improved, and judge ourselves against the imagined perfection, he was willing to just be.

Maybe its more important to start there than the constant chase to get better, improve, or work on myself.

Back in the 90's When Things Were Differnt....

Things have changed dramatically.

Many things for the good. Things such as we have a more diverse source of news and opinions. We are not limited to the single focus of the Rupert Murdoch news agency. With the Internet and cell phones we have moved from the single area of control to the many.

We no longer are dominated by the Hollywood machine of movies. Independent movies are springing up everywhere as well as television, music, art and other media.

On the other hand, this movement has created as much change that we are barely able to keep up emotionally with all the structural shifts. Emotionally it is difficult for us to know which way our, or any country, is going. What is the vision of our future?

Is it the doom and gloom of global warming, collapsing economies, and governments?

Or is there a way each of us can create a future worth living? Can we as individuals, create personal futures that fulfill us and the world?

I think so, we just have never been asked to do such a thing ever, I mean like EVER! We have always been asked to dedicate our lives to our county's point of view against another, or our religions point of view against another.

What if we could design a future worth living, that was for us, by us and supports ? What if just asking the question was enough to start it?

A Life Worth Living

It seems common sense doesn't it? to live a life worth living?

But what is common sense is not common practice.

We still invest our mind, body and soul to things that are ultimately inconsequential.

I have been practicing a kind of mind and body wash, clearing the cobwebs of thought to get present to life as it is, in order to be able to communicate more effectively, cleanly and elegantly.

By keeping in mind simplicity, focus and present awareness, I have begun the road to better use my talents, appreciate the negative comments and , for lack of a better word, attacks, in tow.

Being ones' own person in a world that constantly demands conformity, is what every person form the beginning of time has had to suffer through. It's what is, no escape for anyone. But be on the path. That is my best thought for today. I am on the path, I have shown up.

That is what makes a life worth living, YOU show up. YOU are present.